OT: My Mom, Alice
Dear Longshippers,
Just to recap, my mom has been
very ill since my son, Gabe, and I discovered her unconscious in her apartment last
Christmas morning. We later found out her congestive heart failure, poor
kidney function, and diabetes were all coming to a head and making her very
ill. She battled through that and had been living in an assisted living
apartment since last February. That had been
going fairly well but fluid buildup in her lungs would cause hospital stays or
unexpected doctor visits every six weeks or so.
Mom just wanted to keep living,
even after surviving two trips up to palliative care, where being discharge isn’t
what’s expected. While her outside world seemed to get smaller, her
happiness didn’t. Actually, I think she seemed to appreciate life all the
more over these past eight months.
My mom had to have an amputation above the knee on her left
leg. This was done late September due to complications with gangrene that
formed in a toe. Alice is diabetic and has very poor blood circulation
going into her legs, and one of her toes had a sore that just wouldn’t
heal. After getting topical treatments since last March, something had to
be done to stop the excruciating pain in her foot.
Amputation was the only choice
we had, and we hoped the above the knee option would give her the best chance
at healing. Well, it didn’t heal like we hoped, and last month she had to
have a second procedure done called debridement to remove the tissue around the
wound that didn’t heal. We later found today that procedure
failed too.
That left us with two
options. We could have another amputation, or move mom back up to
palliative care for the comfort approach. Mom didn’t want any more
surgeries, and I’m not sure any surgeon would opt to perform one on her due to
her other health concerns. So, today Alice has been transferred to
palliative care once again, but this time we know the outcome.
She feels comfortable up there,
and it’s also comforting for me to know she’s in a spot that fully understands
and knows how to handle people in the final stages of life.
We don’t know how much time we
have; could be days or weeks. She’s been nothing short of amazing the way
she’s been so determined to keep fighting these battles and obstacles coming
her way. I told mom that now she no longer has to fight for anything, and
she can go up there and relax.
It’s been a crazy year, but it’s
all necessary.
Thanks for listening,
Tim (Happy)
I am so sorry to hear this Happy. Your mom sounds like an amazing woman. My thoughts and prayers to you and your family. Make the most of every moment you have. Know that you did everything you could. Know that she is at peace with the situation. Give her as much comfort and joy as you can. Keep making memories. Make every second count. Sending love and light.
Sorry to hear, I hope you all find peace in your time together. I went through the process with my dad several years ago with throat cancer.
Hang tough...our parents deserve our care and dignity through their tough times, just like their guidance of us.
wishing your family health and happiness.
Hang in there Happy...Sounds like you guys are doing all you can for her. Enjoy the time you have left as best you can.
We're in a similar spot with my MIL. 88, congestive heart failure, now in hospice, buried her 89 year old spouse 1 year ago.
Prayers for you and your family, Happy. Diabetes is such an awful disease. My mom has it as well and though she has good control of it she also suffers through up and down times. She has diabetic neuropathy as well and it takes a toll on her. I wish Alice all the happiness and comfort she can experience. It's a wonderful thing that she has a loving son who is faithfully by her side.
Tim ~ Your mom is a real fighter. What an amazing woman & sounds like she's at peace with her situation. Know that you did all you could. She knows & appreciates it. Prayers being sent to you & your family.
Been through almost the exact same scenario with my Grandpa... stay strong for your Mother and find piece of mind knowing that she is living on her own terms now.
Prayers brother.
I hope she has a peaceful transition, Happy. Enjoy your last moments with her and keep faith that she is moving on to a better place.
Take care, bud.
Love, Peace, Prayers, Positive Vibes, & Happiness to your Mom, Yourself, & Family my friend.
Hey bud... thinking about you man. Let me know if there's anything we can do.
That stuff sucks. I went through a similar time with my Mom in 2005 and 2006. Stay strong, man. It's great you can be with her.
Thanks for the kind words, thoughts, and prayers. Longshippers rock, and you all know how to lift up a fellow member when times are tough.
Today family members from out of town are coming to visit, and mom seems excited and wanted to get dressed before they arrive. She can barely open her eyes, but she's concerned that she looks good for her grand kids, and great grand kids. I'm happy and proud of her for trying so hard. :)
Thanks again for the encouraging posts - it really helps.
Sorry to hear--warm thoughts to you and Fam during this transsission. sp? Remember her strength and laughter that she gave freely.
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