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OT: Losing a parent and other Minnesota thoughts
#21
Quote: @JimmyinSD said:
@greediron said:
@Vanguard83 said:
Condolences.  Been through that also with my brothers.
miss having them to talk to / give advice.

For me just about the time I started soliciting advice, they weren't there anymore.

Hang tough Tom
Funny how long it takes us to realize the wisdom of others.  Usually just in time to miss it. 

I started going through stories my dad has written down from the older people he knew back when he was much younger.  Sort of a a rough history of western ND through the eyes of some of the interesting characters.  I am typing these out for my dad as he has been writing them down.  I have really enjoyed reading them.  Some I heard as stories when I was young, others I only recognize a name here and there.  But a good experience for sure.
I wish I had done that with my Grandpa.  His were a little different though as he was a Merrills Marrauder in WW2 and I learned after his death from my mom that those stories he shared with me,  he never shared those with his wife or kids.   That group of Americans were special and I wish I had taken the time to get his personal recollections saved so I could have shared some of them.  We used to sit by the fire, sit in the boat fishing,  or just sit at the morning table and smoke... we wouldnt really talk to much about anything of substance,  the weather, fishing or whatever, but once in a while Grandpa would just start in on one of his war stories and I was riveted.
My dad and uncle were WWII veterans as well. I think what you saw was the don't bring the war home effect many had. Then as they got older the finality of their lives set in. They felt the need to share their story while they had time. My dad and uncle were in the Pacific Theatre. Merrill's Marrauders were bad@ss. They went deep into enemy territory unsupported. Your grandpa was in special company. That war was a real dark time in humanity. Thank God the good guys won.
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#22
Quote: @suncoastvike said:
@JimmyinSD said:
@greediron said:
@Vanguard83 said:
Condolences.  Been through that also with my brothers.
miss having them to talk to / give advice.

For me just about the time I started soliciting advice, they weren't there anymore.

Hang tough Tom
Funny how long it takes us to realize the wisdom of others.  Usually just in time to miss it. 

I started going through stories my dad has written down from the older people he knew back when he was much younger.  Sort of a a rough history of western ND through the eyes of some of the interesting characters.  I am typing these out for my dad as he has been writing them down.  I have really enjoyed reading them.  Some I heard as stories when I was young, others I only recognize a name here and there.  But a good experience for sure.
I wish I had done that with my Grandpa.  His were a little different though as he was a Merrills Marrauder in WW2 and I learned after his death from my mom that those stories he shared with me,  he never shared those with his wife or kids.   That group of Americans were special and I wish I had taken the time to get his personal recollections saved so I could have shared some of them.  We used to sit by the fire, sit in the boat fishing,  or just sit at the morning table and smoke... we wouldnt really talk to much about anything of substance,  the weather, fishing or whatever, but once in a while Grandpa would just start in on one of his war stories and I was riveted.
My dad and uncle were WWII veterans as well. I think what you saw was the don't bring the war home effect many had. Then as they got older the finality of their lives set in. They felt the need to share their story while they had time. My dad and uncle were in the Pacific Theatre. Merrill's Marrauders were bad@ss. They went deep into enemy territory unsupported. Your grandpa was in special company. That war was a real dark time in humanity. Thank God the good guys won.
It's a good campaign to read on if people are into ww2 and the Pacific theatre.  Just going on the mortality rate of that unit I am pretty lucky to have ever been born.
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#23
I'm sorry I got off topic here Tom. I'm very sorry for your loss. It is true. As time passes you only remember the good time memories. I thought back on my dad who's been gone now over ten years. All I have of him are some pictures, a pocket knife and lots of memories. Those are special enough. I hope as time passes nothing but good memories of your mom. 
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#24
Hi Tom, thanks for sharing your story and sorry for your loss.  My next trip to Minn will probably be similar to yours.  Its good to put these bitter moments behind us and it reminds us how short life is.
I drove through Montana a few months ago, thought of you and the great place you now call home.  Its an amazing state.
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#25
Tom ~ Sorry for your (& family's) loss. Sincere condolences for all.
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#26
Thanks for all of your support, thoughts and prayers gang.  The boxes full of memorabilia that I packed up and sent from a FedEx shipping center in Bloomington last Monday showed up this week.  Just starting to go through stuff.  
There is a 30" tall statue of St. Francis, for instance, that none of my brothers wanted, and the Trophy wife started becoming a "fan of Fran", as one of her favorite poems is the Prayer to St. Francis.  I've got it already polyurethaned for weather, and he is going to live out in one of the gardens, next to the bird bath, home to many Montana birds, ranging from colorful Western Tanagers, Bohemian Waxwings, Stellar Jays and the more common Nuthatches, Mountain Chickadees and Robins.  A perfect home for Fran.
My Mom crocheted ever since I was little.  I sent things home ranging from table runners to shawls to couch throws (she also had created and gave multiples of these to each one of us at Christmas over the years.  Examining the intricacies of each, it was amazing the countless hours she put into these pieces, not to mention hand-made quilts.
I sent the Trophy wife home a day early last Sunday morning, as she caught a flight home (she had to work Monday), and I stayed in Minneapolis, because the burial at Ft. Snelling had to wait until we could get scheduled at Ft. Snelling Monday afternoon.  So after dropping her off, I got a wild hair and went to my first Twins game in probably over 45 years, my first at Target Field.  Thought of my Dad often, because he would take us brothers to the old Met Stadium, where I remember seeing Harmon Killebrew hit many towering home runs, along with Tony Oliva's 100th career homer, plus Mickey Mantle, Boog Powell, Al Kaline and more hit homers.  That was the game that Brian Dozier hit a walk off Grand Slam in the bottom of the 10th.  A good game to get a seat 9 rows behind home plate.  More irony?  I sat next to a couple from Tennessee who were driving Northwest, taking in MLB games, and their ultimate destination was my backyard...Glacier National Park.  So I gave them all kinds of tips on where to go hiking, what to see, where to eat, etc.
One of the many positive outcomes of my Mom's passing was the time that my brothers and I had together.  I have one that lives near New Ulm, and he took care of most of Mom's affairs the last few years.  Another in Milwaukee, and another in Sacramento...and me out here.  We spent hours just talking, going through stuff, trying to connect the dots on some family members, visiting with sisters-in-law and nieces/nephews, cousins, aunts/uncles and neighbors and family friends.
True story:  One fellow came to the house Saturday evening, as we had boxes of stuff assembled in the Living room earmarked for the Estate Sale.  Turned out he was Mom's dentist, who was my dentist in high school and early college before moving out of Minnesota to Michigan's UP for schooling.  I had just told the Trophy Wife about a story earlier that day, that I shared with him.  I was in the chair at his office, and he was doing a root canal on me (I was probably 19), and he had this gorgeous blonde dental assistant.  He kept asking for longer somethings (drill heads?), I remember a 70, an 80 a 90...and finally this gorgeous blonde blurted out "are all your appendages this long?" LOL.  He laughed his ass off and he recalled exactly which one of his dental assistants it was.
Ahhh...going home for the last time.  A trip down memory lane.  Thanks Mom.
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