Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced

[AGRforever]

Talk about a gift and a curse -- Sports Illustrated model and influencer Haley Kalil is opening up on what led to her divorce from NFL player Matt Kalil ... saying his size caused a serious issue in their sex life.

Kalil -- who got divorced from the former Pro Bowler in 2022 -- shared the intimate details on a stream with Marlon Garcia.


(more....a lot more at the link)

https://www.tmz.com/2025/11/05/haley-mat...vorce-nfl/

[StickierBuns]

Well....when your wife weighs 90 lbs and your packing in the top .01% of the male population, yeah....muscle relaxants and salad tongs won't help. Matt the Impaler indeed.

'Lizzo is on Line 1, Mr. Kalil.'

[purplefaithful]

Cardi B on line 2...

[badgervike]

Cardi B on line 2...

The entire Kardashian family on line 3..

[IceRatz16]

Haha...hilarious..."probably 3 Coke cans..."  Holy hell, man!


Couldn't he have used that to his advantage in blocking for his teammates?


No wonder why he was so soft...

[medaille]

It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...

The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).

[hogjowlsjohnny]

It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...

The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).

I'm sure coke cans are used as the universal worldwide measurement standard!
You do realize babies pass through there. It's an amazingly accommodating organ.