Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced
Talk about a gift and a curse -- Sports Illustrated model and influencer Haley Kalil is opening up on what led to her divorce from NFL player Matt Kalil ... saying his size caused a serious issue in their sex life.
Kalil -- who got divorced from the former Pro Bowler in 2022 -- shared the intimate details on a stream with Marlon Garcia.
(more....a lot more at the link)
https://www.tmz.com/2025/11/05/haley-matt-kalil-sex-life-caused-divorce-nfl/
Cardi B on line 2...
Hurry-up Vikings, we ain't getting any younger!
purplefaithful wrote:
Cardi B on line 2...
The entire Kardashian family on line 3..
Haha...hilarious..."probably 3 Coke cans..." Holy hell, man!
Couldn't he have used that to his advantage in blocking for his teammates?
No wonder why he was so soft...
Well....when your wife weighs 90 lbs and your packing in the top .01% of the male population, yeah....muscle relaxants and salad tongs won't help. Matt the Impaler indeed.
'Lizzo is on Line 1, Mr. Kalil.'
It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...
The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).
medaille wrote:
It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).
I'm sure coke cans are used as the universal worldwide measurement standard!
You do realize babies pass through there. It's an amazingly accommodating organ.
Story seems fishy, maybe they waited for marriage, but after dating and then marriage the size was suddenly to much to continue on with? Don't care either way, but sounded like a shock value attention grab bit.
Why isn't Chuck Foreman in the Hall of Fame?
medaille wrote:
It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).
I bet that was a strange google inquiry for your history lol
JimmyinSD wrote:
Story seems fishy, maybe they waited for marriage, but after dating and then marriage the size was suddenly to much to continue on with? Don't care either way, but sounded like a shock value attention grab bit.
Smells fishy.
Kalil's troubles with defensive ends continue.
Should have been a perfect pairing, as both unable to handle gap penetrators.
medaille wrote:
It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).
“The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command."
—George Orwell
medaille wrote:
It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).
Not to brag, but I can cover 3 coke cans
AGRforever wrote:
Talk about a gift and a curse -- Sports Illustrated model and influencer Haley Kalil is opening up on what led to her divorce from NFL player Matt Kalil ... saying his size caused a serious issue in their sex life.
Kalil -- who got divorced from the former Pro Bowler in 2022 -- shared the intimate details on a stream with Marlon Garcia.
(more....a lot more at the link)
https://www.tmz.com/2025/11/05/haley-matt-kalil-sex-life-caused-divorce-nfl/
Turns out, Haley a better blocker, than Matt.
https://www.tmz.com/2026/09/17/haley-kalil-lawsuit-dismissed/
I miss NibeLungen.
He’d have this thread at page 30, before lunch.
savannahskol wrote:
Turns out, Haley a better blocker, than Matt.
https://www.tmz.com/2026/09/17/haley-kalil-lawsuit-dismissed/
I’d guess there’s worse things to be know for then “Two Coke cans Kalil”
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