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+--- Thread: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced (/showthread.php?tid=22139)
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Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - AGRforever - 11-05-2025
Talk about a gift and a curse -- Sports Illustrated model and influencer Haley Kalil is opening up on what led to her divorce from NFL player Matt Kalil ... saying his size caused a serious issue in their sex life.
Kalil -- who got divorced from the former Pro Bowler in 2022 -- shared the intimate details on a stream with Marlon Garcia.
(more....a lot more at the link)
https://www.tmz.com/2025/11/05/haley-matt-kalil-sex-life-caused-divorce-nfl/
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - StickierBuns - 11-05-2025
Well....when your wife weighs 90 lbs and your packing in the top .01% of the male population, yeah....muscle relaxants and salad tongs won't help. Matt the Impaler indeed.
'Lizzo is on Line 1, Mr. Kalil.'
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - purplefaithful - 11-05-2025
Cardi B on line 2...
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - badgervike - 11-05-2025
(11-05-2025, 12:49 PM)purplefaithful Wrote: Cardi B on line 2...
The entire Kardashian family on line 3..
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - IceRatz16 - 11-05-2025
Haha...hilarious..."probably 3 Coke cans..." Holy hell, man!
Couldn't he have used that to his advantage in blocking for his teammates?
No wonder why he was so soft...
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - medaille - 11-05-2025
It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...
The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - hogjowlsjohnny - 11-05-2025
(11-05-2025, 08:00 PM)medaille Wrote: It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...I'm sure coke cans are used as the universal worldwide measurement standard!
The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).
You do realize babies pass through there. It's an amazingly accommodating organ.
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - JimmyinSD - 11-06-2025
Story seems fishy, maybe they waited for marriage, but after dating and then marriage the size was suddenly to much to continue on with? Don't care either way, but sounded like a shock value attention grab bit.
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - AGRforever - 11-06-2025
(11-05-2025, 08:00 PM)medaille Wrote: It's probably more likely that as part of their divorce settlement, he had her say that to get some more cash, but maybe...
The largest human penis ever measured in the entire world was about exactly "2.8 Coke Cans" in size (1 can in girth).
I bet that was a strange google inquiry for your history lol
RE: Some real Viking news. Two Coke Cans Kalil getting divorced - savannahskol - 11-06-2025
(11-06-2025, 07:15 AM)JimmyinSD Wrote: Story seems fishy, maybe they waited for marriage, but after dating and then marriage the size was suddenly to much to continue on with? Don't care either way, but sounded like a shock value attention grab bit.
Smells fishy.
Kalil's troubles with defensive ends continue.
Should have been a perfect pairing, as both unable to handle gap penetrators.